Lonliness
by Velmaneuwirth
Summary: English assignment/Frith Fic. Rewiews welcome.


Autors Notes:  
This is actually an English assaignment I was given. We were told to write a paper with the title 'Loneliness'. And seeings as I had been reading SO many Frasier and Lilith stories thoughout the summer, the only things that were in my head were Frasier and Lilith related. And so I decided to write my paper as if it were a Frith fic. And after showing it to a few of my friends, we decided that I might as well put it up as a fic. The first thing that any fans might notice, is that I didn't say anything about the 'Eco-pod'. As I figured that my English teacher would think I was a bit weirder than he already does. And so I twisted the story a little.   
P.S. I just found out that I got an A for this! *Happy Dance*. Enjoy. :-)  
  
  
As she sat alone in her clinical office on that beautiful summer afternoon, she found it impossible to concentrate on her paperwork. The walls of her office were bare, apart from the four-framed pieces of paper on the far wall. Official documentation of her achievements in medicine, a PhD, an MD, and APA, and an ADD. Her raven hair suddenly danced past her face, riding on the breeze from the open window. Her gaze drifted out towards the lone apple tree in the park across the block. And at that moment her thoughts spiralled, as she couldn't help but compare herself to that solitary tree.  
  
Six months ago she was living with her three-year-old son, and a husband she adored, and who in turn adored her. They were her everything, and now she had nothing. A sick feeling bubbled in the pit of her stomach as the realisation hit her again, as it had each day since she left. It was all her fault.  
  
She had never meant for it to happen, and if she knew it would have ended like this, she would've stayed well away. She had a wonderful relationship with her husband of 7 years; they had just drifted into a slow patch. They had both become too intensely busy with their work. They never seemed to spend any time together. After being asked to help with some research for a new Doctor at the lab in which she also worked, she found herself increasingly attracted to him. After a few months it became clear that her feelings were reciprocated, and one afternoon….. She destroyed everything.  
  
At the time it felt real. She believed she loved this man. And concluded that the best thing for her to do was to leave her husband. Of course, he didn't take it well. Even worse was the fact that she reluctantly agreed to leave him full custody of her son. She felt it was the best thing to do., It was unfair to take him from a home where he felt safe and secure, and expect him to understand why they were now living with a strange man, let alone think of him as his new father.   
  
Officially she was still married. They agreed on a trial separation. She had moved halfway across the country with her new love, which didn't seem so foolhardy at the time. She believed in them. The first 3 months were marvellous. Apart from missing her son desperately, she was as happy as she'd ever been. She should've known it would never last. Nothing good ever lasted in her life. Except…   
…The marriage she left behind. Over 7 years they'd had their differences, as with any couple, but it always ended well. Now, if it weren't for her frivolous actions she'd be with him now, and her son.  
  
By the fourth month of living with the Doctor, life became mundane. Everything he did reminded her of her husband. And he noticed. After weeks of fighting over whether she really loved him, she caved in. She realised that the only man she loved was her husband. But how would he take her back now? She had no right to be forgiven.  
  
Now she was isolated. Living on her own, thousands of miles away from her only son, and the one man she truly loved. They only way she had found to avoid thinking about what she had lost, was to throw herself into her work, often staying overnight, and working until she fell asleep in her office. She had no real friends here, and now no partner. She was basically a figment of her own imagination.   
  
She had thought about going back to her husband. She thought about it every second of every day. But she knew how much she had hurt him, and realised that she didn't have the slightest clue as to how to convince him to take her back. She couldn't even convince herself.   
She had done a terrible thing, and she concluded that she deserved what had happened. If she found it so easy to leave the first time, how could she convince anybody that it wouldn't happen again? No matter how much she loved them. Not only would it kill him, but she couldn't do that to her son a second time.   
  
Six months was a long time to go without her child. And it must have felt like even longer for her son. Would he even remember her? And had his father poisoned his mind against her? He had every right to, after all. To think that she had missed out on half a year of his life already. He must've become so big?   
  
As she rose from her chair to close the window, now looking out into darkness, she made a conscious decision to call the airport as soon as she got home… If you could call it home. And book a flight back to Boston. She couldn't bear to be away from her family for a second longer.   
  
She picked up her briefcase, and proceeded to open her office door. As she stepped out into the hallway she was suddenly overcome by a buzzing, like a swarm of bees. It was the hullabaloo of the other workers in the office building. While she had been absorbed in her thoughts, she had almost forgotten that she was not the only one there. To think that she could be surrounded by so many people, and yet still remain so very much alone… 


End file.
